The Rev. Virginia W. Nagel
Episcopal Diocese of Central NY (Retired)
Today's first reading is from the Book of the Acts of the Apostles. It's one
of the better-known stories from Acts. It tells us of the miraculous conversion
of Saul, the Pharisee and hater of the Way of the Christians, into Paul, the
apostle and evangelist, who did so much to shape the theology of the Church, as
well as planting so many churches throughout the Mediterranean countries.
Conversion basically means to change what a person believes. Some
denominations of the Christian church feel strongly that a person cannot be
truly Christian without experiencing an event like what happened to Saul on the
road to Damascus...a huge, life-changing event, full of emotion, that completely
changes a person in an instant from a non-believer in Jesus Christ to a firm
believer, just like that. In some Christian traditions, it is felt to be
obligatory to be able to tell exactly where and when one was converted to
Christ. A person who can attest to such a conversion experience is thought to be
saved, once for all.
More traditional Christians, however, recognize the fact that conversions
like Saul's are very rare and exceptional. Most Christians acknowledge that
conversion is not an all-in-one-moment experience, although we may become
suddenly aware that we have become believers. But the truth is that conversion
is an on-going part of our life, a process that goes on until the day we die. We
may be aware of a time when we first understood that we had become believers,
but the truth is that, as St. Paul himself wrote, the process of putting
on the mind of Christ is one that goes on in a variety of ways as long
as we live. In fact, the Benedictine family of monks and nuns make a vow to make
this life-long conversion process a priority of their lifestyle, "all the days
of my life," as the vow reads. The Episcopal Book of Common Prayer recognizes
this. At Baptism, Confirmation and at Ordination, the Bishop witnesses the
person's vows, and after the Bishop's hands are laid on in blessing, the Bishop
speaks to the individual: The work that God has begun in you, may he
continue in you. This is, clearly, recognition that conversion is an
ongoing process, whether it be conversion to belief in Christ, to building a
Christian lifestyle, or to growing into the role of ordained minister. Those
words are also an affirmation that we can depend on God's help in continuing the
process of growing into the full measure of Christ, as Paul puts
it...and that we can, ourselves, interfere with the process of lifelong
conversion by turning away from God and from the graces and means he provides to
help us put on Christ.
Those of us who were fortunate enough to grow up in a Christian family may
have no clear memory of what it was like not to be a believer, and thus,
probably cannot put a finger on the exact time or circumstances of their
conversion. It is a great blessing for anyone to grow up in a home where
church-going, daily family prayers, Bible reading and Sunday School attendance
are assumed to be a normal and mandatory part of everyday life. But those of us
who grow up in such homes also have to guard against the danger of "going
through the motions" of Christian lifestyle, without allowing the teachings we
receive to get down into the core of our beings. While it is praiseworthy and
good to have such a family life, we need to be sure that we permit this exposure
to the Good News of God in Jesus to shape and change who we are and what we are.
If the Bible reading, prayers and church attendance roll off our backs like
water off a duck's feathers, we are not being converted into Christians at all!
We have to take in, digest and be changed and molded by the Gospel. That, in
essence, is what conversion is all about.
God, through his church, gives us plenty of tools we can use to deepen our
conversions and to bring ourselves more into the person he wants us to be. There
are literally millions of books to help us understand God's love and his plans
for us and for the world. There are workshops, seminars, movies, TV programs,
college and seminary courses, Christian camps and cruises, magazines and
Christian political groups. There are agencies to bring us into ministry,
helping those in need, where we can learn God's ways by volunteering to help
carry them out in the community: building homes, tutoring youngsters, being a
Big Brother or Sister, taking care of nature, evangelizing, feeding the hungry,
working for justice.
And then there are the things God uses to bring about conversion. You know
that God made human beings in his own image. But our first parents' choice of
sin over holy obedience defaced and corrupted that image of God within us, and
we have all carried on the work of corruption and defacement by our own bad
choices as we progress through life. God, however, is always at work to clean up
his image within us, and return us to the persons he intended us to be when he
made us. His tools, like the tools of a surgeon, are sometimes extremely
painful: worry, sorrow, shame, loss, embarrassment, fear...you remember the old
saying that "there are no atheists in foxholes." Seeing how badly our choices
have turned out for the lives of people we love and respect can make a big
difference in how we live. So can the terrible feelings of loss when we have
casually thrown away the values we have been taught.
Traditionally, the day-to-day tools we are all given to continue and work at
our own conversions are always there: prayer, Bible reading, and charity, which
is actually from the Latin word for love. Prayer, of course, means
spending time each day talking with God, one-on-one. God is always with us, but
we don't usually pay much attention to him. Taking time every day to sit down
and talk with him is a wonderful help. I don't mean so much the idea of reading
him a long list of names of people we want him to heal, help or convert. What I
have in mind is, basically, holding a conversation with God. You might ask him
to help you understand something you heard in church, or something you read in
the paper...Lord, why are so many good people hurting? They didn't do
anything they thought was wrong, and they're losing their homes. And
then, sit quietly, and let God put his thoughts and answers into your mind and
heart. Continue discussing things with him every day...you'd be surprised how
much he will tell you, in his own way and his own good time. Bible reading has
helped millions of people...read a little, and when that imaginary light bulb in
your mind flashes, stop reading and talk to God about what you've read. You and
the Lord will have some great discussions, and you will grow into his way of
seeing things...putting on Christ. And then, roll up your sleeves
and go do something that shows God's, and your, love for people, for the world,
or for justice. Maybe just pick up trash along the street, maybe sign up for
volunteer work somewhere...or make a gift to fill a real need. These are tools
that we all have at hand. Isn't it a pity that more of us don't use them? Imagine
what it would do to the world, if everybody did!
Conversion, you see, is really a journey through life. You learn something
every day, change a habit for the better (God hopes) every now and then, and
consult with God along the way...he's the authority on the how and why, of
course. The finish line? It's when you find your home, your very own space,
reserved for you in his house, and hear him...God himself...tell you, Well
done!
May we all come to hear those words, ourselves, one day. Or, as the Bishops
are always saying, May the good Lord continue in us the work that he has
begun.
Amen.
